How to Connect With Your Kids

Not too long ago I made a video about how to have a spiritually FIT family. One of the steps to being FIT as a family is to spend intentional time together.

I realize that life is busy and it is often difficult to spend intentional time with your kids, but it is of utmost importance. I read somewhere once that the average kid spends less than 5 minutes a day in meaningful conversation with his parents. We have to do better than that. 

In this article I want to give you some goals that you can gradually accomplish in order to have a positive impact on your kids and be more intentional about the time you are spending with them. 

How to Spend Intentional Time with Your Kids

DAILY conversations: Take time each day to deliberately have a conversation. Maybe it’s asking a quick easy question that will help you connect (make sure to ask the right questions). Maybe it’s just noticing something, but connect on a daily basis. Pick a time…maybe before bed, during dinner, right when you get home, or some other time…to intentionally look your kid in the eyes and connect with them through meaningful conversation. Even 5 minutes will go a long way.

WEEKLY hangouts: Be intentional on a weekly hangout time with each of your kids. Take them somewhere, if you can. Maybe it’s to the ice cream parlor. Maybe it’s a coffee shop. Maybe you schedule a game night or a round of that video game they’re into. Set a time. Connect deeper. Do it each week. Make it something you both look forward to. Spend more than five minutes on this weekly time together. It will likely be something you and your kid look forward to.

MONTHLY outings: Each month, do something together as a family. Picnics, movies, mini-vacations, fishing, hiking, or even in-house movie nights or game nights for the whole family will work. Just be intentional and schedule out this month’s outing for your family. Don’t let the to-do list crowd out this time. These monthly family outings are building a solid foundation for a FIT family, and you won’t regret scheduling them when the kids are no longer in the house. 

Daily, weekly, and monthly habits will help your family spend intentional time together, and this intentional time will make it easier to talk about important things when necessary. Five minutes daily, a half an hour to hour weekly, and an afternoon monthly will definitely change your family. 

Remember, small things repeated over time will make a big difference in the way your family interacts with each other.

Getting Started with Family Worship

Parents are the primary disciple makers of their children. The Bible is clear that Christian parents are to disciple their children and point them to God, sharing with them and showing them how God is faithful to His promises.

We see the results of the lack of this over and over again, as well, in the Old Testament.

As a Christian parent and one who works with teenagers, I have seen over and over the statistics that say that parents who teach their kids the ways of Jesus and walk with Him themselves have kids who follow and love Jesus for a lifetime.

 

 

 

 

 

 

These reasons are why I have made a few videos over the last few weeks about “family worship.” You might call it “family devotions” or something else, but the reality is that parents should make time to teach their kids the ways of Jesus.

It’s also not that difficult to get started with Family Worship. That’s why I made this video and would love for you to check it out. In it, I talk about Five Tips for Getting Started with Family Worship.

Let me know what you think about the video.

Family Communication in Difficult Times

There’s a lot going on in the world today. When you turn to the news you see it (on every platform). Pandemics, racism, violence, etc. As a parent, I want to engage my kids in conversations, and as a youth pastor, my job is to engage and guide young people in conversations about these issues (from a Christian worldview).

Unfortunately, we don’t always know how to talk with our kids about these issues. Sometimes we assume they don’t see it or know what’s going on.

NEWS FLASH…they know. My kids often tell me what’s going on in the world today. They have more access to current events than I do because of the media they consume.

So, it is my responsibility to know how to lead them into a conversation that will help them discern biblically what is happening. That’s why I thought up a framework for talking with teenagers that I believe is increasingly important for parents.

Here it is:
– Information
– Emotions
– Discernment
– Response

I explain more in this YouTube video on Family Communication, but basically, I want to know what they know, how they feel about what they know, what they think about what they know, and how they are going to respond based on what they know (from the Scripture).

I’m sure I’ll write more on this in the future, but for now, I’d love it if you would check out the framework on the video below.

Teach Your Kids, But Let Others Teach Them, Too!

Lesson learned: when you are teaching someone, remember that you’re not the only voice they are listening to (and remember, that’s a good thing).

I posted this video earlier on LinkedIn, and it’s all about how I was bragging on my son during one of our weekly pastor’s meetings. One of the other pastors spoke up that the thing that my son had learned was probably learned during one of the sermons that he had preached and not necessarily something I had taught him.

I know he was kidding, but let me tell you a little secret: I don’t care!

It doesn’t matter who my son learned what he learned from.

What matters is that he is listening and learning.

I learned a long time ago that my kids will not only learn about God from me, but they will learn from others as well. And I am thankful for that. It is a blessing to have others who will speak truth into the lives of my kids.

If you’re a parent, look for others who can speak life into your kids. If you’re an adult, be on the lookout for kids you can mentor. You could make a big difference in someone’s life. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Why You Should Have Family Worship at Home

In this video, I talk about why Christian families should have family worship at home and give a bonus tip about how to get started with family devotions.

If you are interested in learning more about family worship and how to get started leading your family in worship at home, check out this video!

Do you have family worship at home?

Summer Bucket List for Families

In this video I talk about five principles that will give your family’s summer activities list some clarity.

All the summer bucket list videos and posts make me jealous! The activities might be fun, but before you plan your summer, think through these five principles.